Stunned

Well here I go again, like a lot of people I have weight problem, and I have had one most of my life. As I struggle with wanting to get pregnant, I am coming to terms with the fact that my weight isn't just an appearance problem but for the first time in my life it is affecting my health. I have known for a while now that weight does effect your ability to get pregnant for some, well I am wondering if it is doing that for me. I want a baby more than anything in the world. I dream of the day when I will have someone call me mom....I know that might sound silly to some but it is my wish.
I have got to decide what am I going to do? I know that my faith is strong, that God certainly is working in my life, I found Jeff. But I also know that we have to meet God half way, we have to prove we want it. We just can't sit and wait for him to do all the work. So....I bought a book I had been hearing about, Eat This Not That. Well I am stunned! I can't believe some of the things that I thought were good for me aren't at all....I mean come on according to the book eating one twix candy bar is the same as eating 11 strips of bacon! I was shocked....so starting tomorrow, I am going to try and take better care of me. I have a loving husband who doesn't care how big I get, but will support me in my venture. I have to change my life...so that my life will change.

Starting Again

Okay, I have been inspired by my friend Debra to start writing the blog again. There is something kind of therpautic about writing things down and not caring or knowing who will see it....so here goes, I am back at it again. These past few months of married life have been great. It is really is a big adjustment to living with someone 24/7. When you are older like we both are you are more set in your ways and think "your way is the only way." Well it is has been a struggle sometimes to give in, say okay it is alright to not do this now, or it is okay to do this a different way. I believe that is one of the most wonderful, amazing and cherised thing about being married. Learning to change and for the better. You are changing to honor something that is a gift from God to you. You aren't giving up yourself for someone else, you aren't becoming someone you don't want to be....you are becoming who you were meant to be. I have always believed that life is a crazy ride and what a ride it is if you let it. Marriage is that same ride and I have known from the moment Jeff and I started talking of getting married and marriage was a ride that I certainly wanted to be on....and I love it!